1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520



I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.


I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.


I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a cheerleader.


I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry, including Enron CEO Ken Lay, I was elected governor of Texas.


I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America. I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money. I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history. With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.


I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record. I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week. I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury. I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history. I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period. I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period. I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market.

In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.

I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, had a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President. I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations. My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.

My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision. I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.

I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed. I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. I changed the U.S.policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts. I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history. I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.

I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history. I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission. I withdrew the U.S.from the World Court of Law. I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention. I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election). I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any President since the advent of television. I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history. I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.

I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community. I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families-in-wartime. In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends. I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security. I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD. I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden [sic] to justice.


All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view. All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view. All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

I am a member of the Republican Party.




The amoeba said...

I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation.

Untrue. Unfortunately. You forget Reagan's invasion of Grenada in 1983. Of course, that was Grenada. But our record in the Mexican and Spanish-American Wars wasn't too savory either. Not to mention a series of variously-provoked incursions into Central and South America, particularly Nicaragua and Panama. For a list of times and places where American forces have been deployed overseas - from which one might infer causes with a little reading, go here.

Otherwise, well, chilling ain't it? So where have We the People been all this time?

Karen said...

o~ none you name are in the same league as *bushies folly*!

Jay Noel said...

Don't forget that he was a member of the Skull & Bones fraternity while at Yale...as was John Kerry.

I will continue to vote for the person I think is the best candidate. I believe blindly voting one party down the line is a flawed mannor to vote. But hey - to each his/her own.

Karen said...

phoenix~ "I will continue to vote for the person I think is the best candidate"...

...that's the strategy I follow which has always steered me in the Dems camp! hopefully your *best candidate* in the last election wasn't bush!

The amoeba said...

Phoenix - I used to think as you do. Then I read an analysis of the strengths and weaknesses of the Congress of the Confederate States of America in James McPherson's Battle Cry of Freedom. Where there were no parties and each candidate ran, and was judged, on individual merit. This, historians have found, was actually a weakness of the Confederate system, as neither the Administration of Jefferson Davis nor its opponents had any tools (such as party discipline) to consistently muster the troops to pass or defeat legislation. The North, on the other hand, had strong parties, with clearly defined positions and the mechanism to rally "the troops". The North won the war. Incidentally, the Democrats might have won the 1864 Presidential election if they had maintained party discipline rather than allowing the party to be split into Peace and War factions.

The "individual" ethic also ruled during the Vietnam era, when candidates from both parties had to market their positions on the war to their constituents irrespective of the positions of their parties. The resulting legislative chaos created, I think, a "drift" in US policy that led to the loss of Vietnam and years of malaise thereafter - which only came to an end with Reagan and his lockstep supporters. From which has descended the iron discipline of today's Republican caucus. To our cost.

Jolynn said...

This is so interesting. I didn't know all of these things. Just the obvious ones that have been going on. It's so infuriating.

Fred said...

And, after looking at the video I've posted this week, he was probably the waterboy for the debate club.

Karen said...

o~ good response.

jolynn~ it's so depressing; sometimes i want to bury my head in the sand and just let the chips fall where they may in this ole world.

fred~ prolly that too! :-)

Eli Blake said...

Also don't forget that in order to get into the Texas Air Guard, he moved up 300 spots (very likely with Daddy's hand somewhere just out of the picture). That means that some other poor sap got pushed off the bottom of that list and went to Vietnam. He also got into Yale with grades that wouldn't normally bode a trip there, meaning that someone else who deserved it more, got a rejection letter from Yale. And when he sold the Harken Energy stock, the price went down, so some other investor(s) lost money. In the course of his rise, there are a lot of people who have GWB's footprint on their back, and probably don't even know the reason for their 'bad luck'.

Also, one of the things that came out in the Conseco account last year was that he used steroids while a member of the Rangers, and that it was done with the knowlege of the ownership.

The Phoenix:

In the past, I have voted for some Republicans. Unfortunately, I can't right now because the top-down style of management of the Federal government has caused many other Republicans to become enablers of the Bush policy. Wonder why he has yet to veto anything that Congress sends him? Answer-- everything they send him is consistent with his policy. Yeah, every now and then they will step up and disagree with him, generally on an issue that scores political points (and he actually had to yield on at least one-- the Dubai ports deal) but at the end of the day, on the really big questions of budget, taxes, presidential power, suppression of dissent and Iraq/foreign policy, this Congress gives him what he wants. Further, let's even suppose for the sake of argument that you have one of those vanishingly rare Republicans who actually is 'moderate' and often votes against the President. The fact is, they can count votes well enough to allow it-- on the rare occasions when they need that vote, they arrange to get it (a lot of bad bills have been passed in Congress by 217-215 margins or something similar) by allowing said congressman to vote against them without consequences on the next dozen votes when it doesn't matter. And the most important vote that said congressman makes is on the first day-- to sustain the leadership. Then, they have very little to do with the leadership, it is determined by the Hasterts, the DeLays (now Boehlerts), the Frists and the Santorums. These people make sure that Congress delivers what the Bush administration wants.

So, there may be some Republicans worth voting for, and if a Democrat, or even a reasonable Republican administration were in the White House, you could justify it, but right now, a vote for a Republican (especially for Congress or the Senate) is a vote for the Bush agenda. That's an unfortunate fact.

puppytoes said...

i could have sworn i left a comment here this morning! seriously, is Blogger now randomly deleting comments before they see the light of day? or is it dubya's buddies... keeping a watchful eye out for their good ole boy.

either way, i'll have to regroup and remember what i said. i'm pretty sure it was brilliant AND hysterical... (yeesh. i *hate* when this happens!)

i'll be back! : P

Jack K. said...

You bet I am going to remember and consider your background when voting the next time. With a little bit of luck The margin will be too great to screw with the results.

I only hope there are some folks watching over the electronic voting machines.

Karen said...

eli~ thanks for adding to the bushie list. suspect there's lots more that few know about.

puppytoes~ "brilliant AND hysterical"... expect nothing less from you! *grin*

croak~ "us morons"... change that to "those morons" then you're *spot on*.

jack~ "some folks watching over the electronic voting machines"... maybe we need to get involved, eh?

Mike V. said...

it's amazing how far one can go with one's family's money, no?

Karen said...

mike~ yep! foolishly spent, eh?

sage said...

are you sending out his resume--hoping he'll get a new job offer and retire early? Although I agree with o ceallaigh about our other invasions, too much of this is true.

Karen said...

sage~ yes, very depressing.

carmilevy said...

Definitely not written by a member of the Republican Party, eh? Funny how it all looks so stark when it's read all together.

Sad. America deserves better.

Miss Cellania said...

When you put this all together in one place, its even more depressing than ever. My cat would've made a better president.

Karen said...

croak~ cheers backacha!

carmi~ it is sadsadsad. :(

miss cellania~ yes, very depressing.