Now for some light-hearted Friday Fun!

THINGS STRESSED WOMEN MAY SAY AT WORK...

1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.
2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and
senseless acts of self-control?
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet!
16. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.
17. Don't worry, I forgot your name, too.
18. I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.
19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
20. Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
21. Chaos, panic and disorder .. my work here is done.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like shit. Is that the style now?
24. Earth is full, go home.
25. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?
26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
29. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
30. Look in my eyes .. Do you see one ounce of gives-a-shit?

WHICH ONE IS YOUR FAV!?!

Red Wings head home tied at two.
Two key third period goals lifted the Red Wings to a 4-2 victory over the Oilers in Game 4, sending the series back to Detroit tied at two.

Pistons start fast, beat Bucks for 2-0 series lead. Prince, Billups pave way for Detroit; Redd scores 29 for Milwaukee...

From the Flint Journal...

FEELING BETRAYED: Where is the outrage? I'm mad as hell. I'll probably never vote Republican again. Bush lies, spies and now leaks. How dare these wolves in sheep's clothing use our faith to humiliate us? God forgive America.

Kudos to 'jc's designs'

It's MONDAY MEME!...
please email suggestions for next week's!

British billionaire Richard Branson says his Virgin Group is on track to become the world’s first commercial spaceline, with suborbital flights for space tourists due to start in 2008.

Virgin Galactic will offer 'spaceflights' for $200,000, and says it has already received more than 150 firm reservations and taken $13.1 million in deposits. About 45,000 people have expressed an interest in the trips.

Weigh In!... What are your thoughts on commercial space travel!?!


Kudo's to 'jc's designs'

Pistons blow out Bucks
in playoff opener
Rasheed Wallace, Hamilton boost offense, defense shuts down Redd

Updated: 9:59 p.m. ET
April 23, 2006
AUBURN HILLS, Mich. - Make that one win down, 15 to go for the Detroit Pistons on their way to a second title in three years.

OFF SHOPPING... HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!
HAPPY *EARTH DAY*

Maltby's 2 goals give top-seeded Detroit 3-2 win over Edmonton in Game 1

fun facts for friday...
I've been *tagged* by the kewl awesome 'puppytoes' so here goes, ew boy, think she's gonna be sorry she tagged me; the cops will know where to find me now after all these years! :giggle:

6 things you really don't need to know about me...

1. Once upon a time many moons ago, when I was young, I was a hell raiser. Let me 'xplain... I remember driving to Florida from Michigan with one of my bestest girlfriends. Every time we saw *cute guys* we had to show off, of course! One of our tricks was to change drivers, not while the car was stopped, no, what would be the fun of that!?! We did it while driving...back then most cars had bench seats so one of us slid under the other on the driver's side while car was in transport, preferably through the mountains, for effect... you know!

2. Continuing with the 'many moons ago' theme... once in Florida, oh, did we have fun! Stole empty pop and beer bottles and cans from the outside containers (one of us would be the look-out while the other was the thief). So yer wonderin' what did we
need empty bottles and cans fer, or did ya already figger it out!?! CASH, OF COURSE!!

3. Okay, one more... shhhhhhhhhhhh! puleeeeeeeeeze don't tell anyone this... after we got the goods, we hunted down the cops and took them out in the 'boonies' to makeout all night long! What didya think I was gonna say!?! {grin}

4. OH, I ALMOST FORGOT THE MONSTER!! Before we left for Florida, I stole a bottle of wine from my folks' store and we went down by the lake and drank the whole thing and then peed our pants when we saw the *monster* emerge from the lake!

5. Met Bruce Maher of the Detroit Lions at the Northway Bar in Houghton Lake... he bought us drinks all night long and I got smashed! Boy, was that fun... he was a cutie!!

6. By the way, the first 5 happened before I was married... silly you for thinking otherwise! :THE END:

'Detroit produces top teams in both NBA, NHL'

DETROIT (AP) - Hockeytown or Hoopstown?

Detroit is both.

The top teams at the end of the NBA and NHL
regular seasons are from the same city for the
first time, with the Pistons and Red Wings
combining to pull off the feat for the Motor City...

Oh my, my, my, my... I absolutely FREAK OUT during the playoffs... poor hubby ... oh my, my, my, my... two months of drama and excitement ... how much better can it get!?! DEEEEEE-TROIT BAS-KET-BALL! AND, GO RED WINGS!!

This was in the Talk Back
section of my hometown
paper today...
BUSH'S WISH:
To all of you Bush supporters complaining
about the price of gasoline: Bush wants you to park your car, shut your mouth,
sit at home and praise him for saving Iraq.
Enough said!

Intense and widespread opposition to President Bush is likely to
be a sharp spur driving voters to the polls in this fall's midterm elections, according to strategists in both parties, a phenomenon that could give Democrats a turnout advantage over Republicans for the first time in recent years.

A Post-ABC News 'poll' found that 59 percent of registered voters approve of their own representative, a lower number than in past months. But only 35 percent approve of the way Congress is doing its job. Forty percent said they plan to vote for a Republican in this year's House elections, and 55 percent said they will vote for a Democrat.

Kudos to 'jc's designs'

First Place
Detroit Red Wings
58 wins - 15 losses -
8 overtime losses

Red Wings clinch Presidents' Trophy with League's best record

Red Wings just beat Stars 3 - 2

It's MONDAY MEME!...
please email suggestions for next week's!


Actor Tom Cruise 'says' his Catholic-born fiance, actress Katie Holmes, has joined him as a follower of the Church of Scientology but insists that doesn't mean she can't make noise when she gives birth to their child.

Cruise, 43, addressed questions about the religious faith of his pregnant bride-to-be, the child they are expecting and Scientology's practice of "silent birth" in an ABC News television interview.

Weigh In! How do you feel about the idea of "silent birth"!?!

Kudo's to 'jc's designs'

First Place
Detroit Pistons
64 wins - 16 losses
breaks franchise record!

The Pistons and Detroit Red Wings are the first teams from the same city to finish with the NBA and NHL's best regular-season record in the same season. ... The Pistons also tied a team record with their 37th home win.

Pistons beat Knicks 103 - 97

Politically Correct Terms For Males:

He does not have a beer gut: He develops a Liquid Grain Storage Facility.
He does not hog the blankets; He is: Thermally unappreciative.
He is not unsophisticated; He is: Socially malformed.
He does not eat like a pig; He suffers from: Reverse bulimia.
He is not a sex machine; He is: Romantically automated.
He is not a male chauvinist pig; He has: Swine empathy.
He is not quiet; He is a: Conversational minimalist.
You do not undress him with your eyes; you have an: Introspective pornographic moment.
He is not afraid of commitment; He is: Monogamously challenged.
He does not have a fabulous rear end; He has achieved: Buttocks perfection.
He is not stupid; He suffers from: Minimal cranial development.
He does not get lost all the time; He discovers: Alternative destinations.
He is not balding; He is in: Follicle regression.
You do not buy him a drink; you initiate an: Alcohol-For-Conversation exchange.
He does not fart and belch; He is: Gastronomically expressive.
His jeans are not too tight; He is: Anatomically under circulated.
He is not a Redneck; He is a: Genetically-related American.
You do not kiss him; you become: Facially conjoined.
He is not a cradle robber; He prefers: Generationally differential relationships.
He does not get falling down drunk; He becomes: Accidentally horizontal.
He does not act like a total jerk; He develops a: Case of rectal-cranial inversion.
He is not short; He is: Anatomically compact.
He does not have a rich daddy; He is a: Recipient of Parental Asset Infusion.
He does not constantly talk about cars; He has a: Vehicular addiction.
He does not have a hot body; He is: Physically combustible.

Feel free to add your expertise to the above list!

Politically Correct Terms For Females:

Her breasts will never sag, they will lose their vertical hold.
She does not get drunk, she is accidentally over served or she becomes verbally dyslexic.
She does not get PMS, she becomes hormonally homicidal.
She does not hate sports on TV, she is athletically biased.
She does not have a great butt, she is gluteus to the maximus.
She does not have a hard body, she is anatomically inflexible.
She does not have a killer body, she is terminally attractive.
She does not have big hair, she is overly aerosoled.
She does not have big hooters, her cups runneth over.
She does not have great cleavage or a great rack, her breasts are centrally located.
She does not have sexy lips, she is collagen dependent.
She does not shave her legs, she experiences temporary stubble reduction.
She does not shop too much, she is overly susceptible to marketing ploys.
She does not snore, she is nasally repetitive.
She does not sun bathe, she experiences solar enhancement.
She does not wear too much makeup, she is cosmetically oversaturated.
She does not work out too much, she is an abdominal overachiever.
She does not: Get Drunk, She becomes Verbally Dyslexic.
She is not a bad cook, she is microwave compatible.
She is not a bad driver, she is automotively challenged.
She is not a gossip, she is a verbal terminator.
She is not a Perfect 10, she is numerically superior.
She is not cold or frigid, she is thermally incompatible.
She is not easy, she is horizontally accessible.
She is not hooked on soap operas, she is melodramatically fixated.
She is not too skinny, she is skeletally prominent.
She will never gain weight, she will become a metabolic underachiever.
You do not ask her to dance, you request a precoital rhythmic experience.

(stay tuned tomorrow for "Politically Correct Terms For Males" and feel free to add your expertise to the above list!)

hmmmmm, any comments, captions...

loaded question, huh!?!