3.31.2006

How America sees the world
... he, he, he

kudos to 'BlueBolt'
... click on image to enlarge




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3.30.2006

"Nearly
three-
quarters of Americans questioned last week —
74 percent — said they encounter profanity in public frequently or occasionally, according to an Associated Press-
Ipsos poll. Two-thirds said they think people swear more than they did 20 years ago. And as for, well, the gold standard of foul words, a healthy 64 percent said they use the F-word — ranging from several times a day (8 percent) to a few times a year (15 percent).

Like any bartender, Joe Cormack, of Fort Dodge, Iowa, hears a lot of talk. He’s not really offended by bad language — heck, he uses it himself every day. But sometimes, a customer will unleash the F-word so many times, Cormack just has to jump in.

And it’s not just at the bar. Or on TV. (Or on the Senate floor, for that matter, where Vice President Dick Cheney used the F-word in a heated argument two years ago.)..."

Ironically, Cheney and the bushie regime is the reason the F-word was introduced into my vocabulary!

What *choice* words do you use when driven over the edge!?!

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3.29.2006

Things you have to believe
to be a Republican today...

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Daddy Bush made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Baby Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving or military record is none of our business.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

You support states' rights, but the Attorney General can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

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3.28.2006

The Chicks' new single, "Not Ready to Make Nice," is now in rotation in several major markets, pushing it to No. 36 on Billboard's country singles chart after its first full week of airplay. Other stations, however, have been slower to embrace it.

Maines told a London audience on the eve of the war in Iraq that the group was "ashamed" the president was from their home state of Texas. Back in the U.S., their music was boycotted and the Chicks said they received death threats, leading them to install metal detectors at their shows.

Click here to listen to their new single, "Not Ready to Make Nice," (be sure to have your sound on before clicking).

Then answer the question below!


QUESTION... WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE BOYCOTT?


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3.27.2006

Thank you
'Mike Ashley (Hale McKay)' for providing today's discussion. Please email suggestions for next week's MONDAY MEME! Okay, here we go...

One of my pet peeves is "political correctness" and "PC Police." I am not alone when I say it is getting out of hand. It is "Big Brother" gone awry. I call these people the "GPC" - the Gestapo Political Commies."
...The following is an excerpt from an article that appeared in The Boston Herald of 3/23, and was on a wire service from London, England.

Teachers at nursery schools in Oxfordshire have asked children to change the words of "Baa, Baa Black Sheep" to "Baa, Baa Rainbow Sheep" to avoid the possibility of offending ... anyone.
...."This type of thing is definitely happening in all parts of the country," Laura Midgley, co-founder of Britain's Campaign Against Political Correctness, told the Cox News Service. "This makes an issue about the color black when there should not be one. It's just a color at the end of the day," she added.
....Nonetheless, as in the United States, the removal of alienating or potentially offensive words is part of a political-correctness drive that has gained momentum across British society.
....This isn't the first time nursery rhymes have fallen victim to Britain's PC campaign. In 2003, the Mothercare chain began selling music featuring a new version of "Humpty Dumpty" in which the ovoid oddball "got up again."
...."Baa, Baa Black Sheep" has nothing to do with race. The nursery rhyme dates back to the mid-1700's and is related to a tax imposed on wool by the King. Black wool was apparently taxed at a lower rate than white wool," said Midgley.

....Verdict: Ewe gotta be kidding!

Kudo's 'to jc's designs'
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3.26.2006

Please join us for a spirited discussion provided
by guest blogger 'Mike Ashley (Hale McKay)'
on tomorrow's MONDAY MEME!

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3.25.2006


Republicans assert dominance in the bedroom
'Magazine article' researches which party rates better at sex

Republicans control Congress and the White House. According to an informal study in the latest issue of “GQ” magazine, the GOP is also asserting its dominance over Democrats in the bedroom.

The anonymous author, who wrote the piece for “GQ” reports “After years of intensive research on both sides of the aisle, I’m here to report that Republican men are infinitely better to have sex with.”

The article in the April issue of “GQ” lays out 10 reasons why Republicans are better and kinkier in the sack...

QUESTION? Who is better in the sack, Dems or Repubs!?!

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3.24.2006

THIS IS THE MAN WHO SHOULD HAVE BEEN PRESIDENT.
This is the man who CAN be President.

Renee said, "Wonderful, human video of Al Gore from 2000. I recommend watching it if your computer allows"...

During the 2000 Presidential campaign, Al Gore, a movie fan in general and a fan of Being John Malkovich in particular, asked Spike Jonze to come down to his house for a day to follow him and his family around with a camera. Spike brought his tiny handheld video camera and came up with a portrait so real, so humanizing, and so powerful that of course Gore's advisors had to bury it.

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3.23.2006

The last two days have been satire but today it's time to get serious. Since this is the third anniversary week of the start of war in Iraq, it only seems fitting to devote this week to the atrocities of the Bush administration whether it be through satire or real life. In my visits today amongst the blogsphere I noticed that Lisa and Mike both had posts on Bush's press conference so without further ado...

I'm talking about Iraq
I liked this exchange in yesterday's press conference with the president. It really demonstrates how Bush still tries to mix up Iraq and Afghanistan as if they were the same country. It still needed one more follow up Q(uestion): Didn't we kick out weapons inspectors to start the war in Iraq this time?

THE PRESIDENT: ...Helen. After that brilliant performance at the Grid Iron, I am -- (laughter.)

Q You're going to be sorry. (Laughter.)

THE PRESIDENT: Well, then, let me take it back. (Laughter.)

Q I'd like to ask you, Mr. President, your decision to invade Iraq has caused the deaths of thousands of Americans and Iraqis, wounds of Americans and Iraqis for a lifetime. Every reason given, publicly at least, has turned out not to be true. My question is, why did you really want to go to war? From the moment you stepped into the White House, from your Cabinet -- your Cabinet officers, intelligence people, and so forth -- what was your real reason? You have said it wasn't oil -- quest for oil, it hasn't been Israel, or anything else. What was it?

THE PRESIDENT: I think your premise -- in all due respect to your question and to you as a lifelong journalist -- is that -- I didn't want war. To assume I wanted war is just flat wrong, Helen, in all due respect --

Q Everything --

THE PRESIDENT: Hold on for a second, please.

Kudo's to 'jc's designs'
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3.22.2006

Let's start with a little satire from

Andy Borowitz...

March 21, 2006 - In an effort to confuse Iraqi insurgents, the Pentagon announced today that the United States has begun bombarding insurgent positions with copies of President Bush's Medicare prescription drug plan. At a press briefing at the Pentagon, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said that the idea of confusing the insurgents with the Medicare plan was hatched last week, after Bush appeared at a series of town hall meetings at which seniors in his audience seemed thoroughly bewildered by the intricate new program. "We realized, if this prescription drug plan is that confusing in English, imagine how incoherent it would seem once it was translated into Arabic," Rumsfeld said.

As soon as Pentagon planners seized upon
the idea of using the president's plan to confuse the insurgents, Operation Incomprehensible Program was launched. According to Rumsfeld, U.S. warplanes pounded insurgent positions in the cities of Tikrit and Najaf with copies of the prescription drug plan i
n the early morning hours of Monday.

Rumsfeld said that satellite photos of those positions have been encouraging thus far, showing dozens of Iraqi insurgents reading the prescription drug plan and scratching their heads.

The Defense Secretary said he was hopeful that Operation Incomprehensible Program would leave the Iraqi insurgents totally baffled, but he hinted that the Pentagon had other tactics up its sleeve: "We are fully prepared to bombard them with copies of my press briefings."

What has Bush done to enhance your life since taking office!?!

Kudo's to 'jc's designs'
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3.21.2006

Bill Maher's closing bit the other night:

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war because

you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people.
Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished. Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man?
Now I know what you're saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church and Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote. But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal.
You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.
On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.
So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: 'Take a hint.'

Okay Bush voters... weigh in here!

Has your opinion of Bush changed?
HOW and WHY?

Kudos to 'jc's designs'
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3.20.2006

Welcome
to the first MONDAY MEME!
Bring

your cup
of coffee
along and most of all, your valued opinion. Every Monday I will post your comments with follow-up questions. Please email me with your suggestions, possibly with a link if it a news-related event. I will toss them all in a hat and draw the lucky winner! The following related news story and questions came from '
Michele's' site. Okay, read away!!

'
Related news story'

For a year, Julee Lacey stopped in a CVS pharmacy near her home in a Fort Worth suburb to get refills of her birth-control pills. Then one day last March, the pharmacist refused to fill Lacey's prescription because she did not believe in birth control. "I was shocked," says Lacey, 33, who was not able to get her prescription until the next day and missed taking one of her pills. "Their job is not to regulate what people take or do. It's just to fill the prescription that was ordered by my physician." Some pharmacists, however, disagree and refuse on moral grounds to fill prescriptions for contraceptives. And states from Rhode Island to Washington have proposed laws that would protect such decisions. (By the way, the guy behind Lacey successfully buys Viagra from the same pharmacist.)

Do you agree that pharmacists must dispense any and all drugs a doctor prescribes? Do you think a pharmacist should be permitted to "refuse on moral grounds to fill prescriptions for contraceptives?"


kudos to 'jc's designs'
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3.19.2006

Since there's
so many meme's
out in the blogsphere, I said, "why not me?" Soooooooooooooo tomorrow I will launch MONDAY MEME! You, dear internets, will be able to voice your opinions and even send me your suggestions for the following meme. I will put all suggestions in a hat (how quaint, eh) and draw the weekly winner. Your questions will then be used for the next MONDAY MEME with kudos to you, dear internet.

Ladies & Gents... start your engines and roarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr on over here tomorrow! Be there or be square, eh, be (here) or be square, ya know what I mean!!!

kudos to 'jc's designs'

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3.18.2006

The Ten Best Things about Global Warming:
Brought to you by GardenEarth.com and the authors of
DEAD MARS, DYING EARTH.


10. Why pay for tattoos when melanoma's free?
9. No more pesky weeds. In fact, no more pesky plants.
8. Nile Encephalitis: not just for Egyptians anymore.
7. Furnaces convert easily into tornado shelters.
6. Helsinki: the new Riviera.
5. Middle East oil producers feel right at home— everywhere.
4. Golfers only need a putter and a sand wedge.
3. For those who can't get enough of global warming. One word: Venus.
2. Steaks, medium rare, on the hoof.
1. Three thongs and you're dressed!

Play along by adding your best thing about global warming in backacha!

I'll start with #11. Water skiing on Lake Michigan in January!

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3.17.2006

HAPPY

ST.

PATRICK'S

DAY

backacha!


kudos to 'BlueBolt'
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3.16.2006

Check the guy in the lower left......... that's Bill Gates. Paul Allen, the owner of the Seattle Seahawks with a net worth around $20 billion is on the far right, lower corner!!

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3.15.2006

NO 'DUBYA' IN A PERFECT WORLD...
eh, PERFECT ORLD, THANKS ELI!

kudo's to 'jc's designs'
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3.14.2006

In a 'speech'
at George Washington University in
the capital,
Bush delivered the first
in a series of planned speeches aimed
at convincing Americans he
has a strategy
for victory,
nearly three years after the
U.S.-led invasion.

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3.13.2006

Hop on over to 'Sar's' to join in the discussion...

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3.12.2006

More fun weekend stuff continued...

The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:

1. Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

2. Cashtration (n.) The act of buying a house, which renders the
subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.

3. Giraffiti (n) Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

4. Sarchasm (n) The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person
who doesn't get it.

5. Inoculatte (v) To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

6. Hipatitis (n) Terminal coolness.

7. Osteopornosis (n) A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

8. Karmageddon (n) It's like, when everybody is sending off all
these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like,
a serious bummer.

9. Decafalon (n.) The grueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.

10. Glibido (v) All talk and no action.

11. Dopeler effect (n) The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
when they come at you rapidly.

12. Arachnoleptic fit (n.) The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

13. Beelzebug (n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into
your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

14. Caterpallor (n.) The color you turn after finding half a grub
in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:
15. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

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3.11.2006

Okay, you lovers of the English language - this gave me a stitch...HAPPY WEEKEND!!!

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

The winners are:


1. Coffee (n.) the person upon whom one coughs.


2. Flabbergasted (adj.) appalled over how much weight you have gained.


3. Abdicate (v.) to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.


4. Esplanade (v.) to attempt an explanation while drunk.


5. Willy-nilly (adj.) impotent.


6. Negligent (adj.) describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.


7. Lymph (v.) to walk with a lisp.


8. Gargoyle (n.) olive-flavored mouthwash.


9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.


10. Balderdash (n.) a rapidly receding hairline.


11. Testicle (n.) a humorous question on an exam.


12. Rectitude (n.) the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n) a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.) a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.


15. Frisbeetarianism (n.) (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.


16. Circumvent (n.) an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

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3.10.2006

SCHOOL PRAYER

Kudos to 'jc's designs'
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Poll: Bush At Low Point, GOP Support Weakens ...click!


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3.09.2006


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3.08.2006

~ HANGING WOMEN OUT TO DRY ~
South Dakota is Hanging Women Out to Dry.

'South Dakota Governor Mike Rounds (R) has





"And nice designs, jc. It's a shame you have to make them, though. I still feel like we're in the modern Middle Ages - or Dark Ages, even... Denise"


kudos to 'jc's designs'


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Email from my daughter...Hoity toity tax dollars hard at work! I, for one, am soooo relieved to know that Oakland County establishments are being kept safe from girls in short shorts with low-cut tops. Not sure I could live knowing that a boob might slip out sometime in a nightclub that only allows admittance to adults 21 years of age and older. Heaven forbid an adult should inadvertently see a boob. It may scar the person for life! Eeeeegads! Violent crime...what's that???

Here's what it's all about... "Rumors of topless dancers titillating Super Bowl revelers and police reports of fights and unruly behavior have brought two of downtown Birmingham's most popular venues, the Blue Martini and the City Cellar Wine Bar & Grill, under scrutiny from city officials."

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3.07.2006

'Life in Michigan'
" Blind pigs like this one at 932 E. Columbia flourished all over the city during prohibition. In 1929, illegal liquor was second only to the auto industry in Detroit in terms of revenue -- $215 million."

This is a follow up on my Canadian marijuana post. You're wondering how the two connect? I liken attitudes on marijuana the same as attitudes were on liquor during Prohibition. Here's what 'Phoenix' said, "I really don't know much about the whole marijuana thing. I'm on the fence. On one hand, I've met successful intelligent business people that smoke it once in awhile for fun.

On the other, I was also a high school teacher, and I swear to God my potheads were the most idiotic, stupid, and brainless beings in the world. Even smoking just plain tobacco can literally rot your brain.

I do know that smoking marijuana creates oxidation in your body, which releases tons of free radicals.

Free radicals cause aging and disease in humans...a good analogy would be leaving metal outside in the rain. Oxidation leads to rust."

So my big question is: Doesn't that basically describe alcoholics, therefore, the outlawing of liquor in the early 1900's? *sigh*

You wonder where I'm going with this? Right now there are hundreds, probably thousands of individuals in prison with hardened criminals serving sentences of years for marijuana possession. Same thing would be happening if liquor was still prohibited, jails filled.

btw, my Dad used to run a "blind pig"... people would knock on the door with a "Joe sent me" message.

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Torturing The Constitution

kudos to 'jc's designs'
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3.06.2006

I've said it before and
I'll shout it out again, "I LOVE MY CANADIAN NEIGHBORS"! They have the balls to do what some, I should say half, of the United States would have a *tissy fit* about and that is not make a big deal about marijuana! WTF is wrong with marijuana... NOTHING!!!

Here's the story my rant came from:

"His name is Marc Emery and he is called the "Prince of Pot." He claims to have sold more marijuana seeds than anyone in the world and, to date, no one has disputed that claim. He lives in Vancouver, British Columbia, where the culture is rather permissive concerning marijuana. The Canadian government, for the most part, has left Emery and his business alone"...
read on...
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3.05.2006

I saw this over on 'Bryan's' and thought it sounded like fun.

SPIRIT!
WIND!
which chinese symbol are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

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3.04.2006


If you feel you're not getting a mammogram until 'hell freezes over', you might want to try these ideas first!

Women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in and around your home.


EXERCISE ONE:

Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in door. Shut the door as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five
seconds. Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective enough.


EXERCISE TWO:

Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat with the other breast.



EXERCISE THREE:

Freeze two metal bookends over night. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set up an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again.

YOU ARE NOW TOTALLY PREPARED!

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3.03.2006

Can't help myself, it won't go away & it's too *juicy* to resist but I promise this is the last one... {grin}

WASHINGTON, D.C. - A White House source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice-President Dick Cheney the Medal of Freedom, the national highest civilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney. The source was quoted to say, "All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another and Cheney actually had the balls to do it."

In a related story, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters, wishing to bag a lawyer, to have the new "lawyer's stamp" on their hunting license. Currently Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer, and bear, at a cost of $7 annually. The new"lawyers stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long.

The department further stated that although the "lawyers stamp" comes at a hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate annual revenues in excess of $3 billion dollars the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting license stamps.

"We can't get bin Laden, but we nailed a 78-year-old attorney." --David Letterman

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3.02.2006

This is absolutely amazing. It just shows what attitude will do for you. All I can say is, you go guy!

'At 95, Mr. Smith is trying to get to Washington'

Given his age, Sid Smith's campaign slogan seems obvious: "At 95, who needs term limits?"

"I'm the oldest guy in this race," said Smith, joking that his Dec. 24 birthday makes him "one day older than Jesus."



Everyone is trying to accomplish something big, not realizing that life is made up of little things.
- Frank A. Clark

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3.01.2006

Bush Ratings At All-Time Low


"The latest CBS News poll finds President Bush's approval rating has fallen to an all-time low of 34 percent, while pessimism about the Iraq war has risen to a new high."

"Just 18 percent said they had a favorable view of the vice president, down from 23 percent in January."

kudos to 'jc's designs'


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